Building Your Entrepreneurial Support System with Rhonda Peterson and Teresa McCloy

Amber [00:00:24]:
Welcome to season 5 of the My Biz Bestie Podcast. I'm Amber Hawley.

Maelisa Hall [00:00:28]:
And I'm Melissa Hall.

Amber [00:00:29]:
And today we have a special treat. We have our awesome My Biz Bestie episode. And so with that, we have two amazing ladies in the house. We have Rhonda Peterson and Theresa McCloy, and they are super besties.

Maelisa Hall [00:00:47]:
Super besties. Ooh, new.

Amber [00:00:48]:
They are. Well, I think they're super, and the way they support each other is super. So that's why we wanted to have them on. So anyway, welcome Rhonda and Teresa.

Rhonda Peterson [00:00:57]:
Thank you. Thank you. Good to be with you.

Theresa McCloy [00:00:59]:
Great to be here.

Maelisa Hall [00:01:00]:
Yes, I am super excited. We, the four of us, have not done a meeting like this before, and we've already been having a blast before we started recording. So I have a feeling this is going to be a fun episode.

Amber [00:01:11]:
Yes. And now actually just realizing, let's make— if you want to play like a drinking game to this, every time we say super, I want you to take a drink.

Theresa McCloy [00:01:24]:
Oh, that could go so wrong.

Amber [00:01:27]:
I know, I know. So welcome, ladies.

Rhonda Peterson [00:01:29]:
Super, super, super funny.

Maelisa Hall [00:01:33]:
Oh, I think that was 4 sips right there.

Amber [00:01:36]:
Super fantastic. Awesome. Rhonda, why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself?

Rhonda Peterson [00:01:41]:
I'm Rhonda Peterson. I am an executive coach. I work with entrepreneurs in the financial services arena. Helping them get honed in on their ROE, which is return on energy, so that they can get a higher ROI in their business and in their life.

Amber [00:01:59]:
Oh, I love that.

Rhonda Peterson [00:02:00]:
Oh, thank you.

Amber [00:02:02]:
You have all kinds of management.

Maelisa Hall [00:02:04]:
I know, and you just have all kinds of good phrases. You are like a tweetable just walking around.

Theresa McCloy [00:02:08]:
I know, it's like, let's just get those letters. Can you repeat that?

Amber [00:02:13]:
Well, it'll be in the show notes, ladies. It'll be in the show.

Rhonda Peterson [00:02:16]:
Oh, thank goodness.

Maelisa Hall [00:02:19]:
Yes, our super fantastic show notes.

Amber [00:02:21]:
Oh, we are so sorry, people. It's so wrong. Well, Theresa, why don't you let everyone know a little bit about you?

Theresa McCloy [00:02:31]:
Sure, my name is Theresa McCloy, and I have a business I called The Real Life Process, which is a framework for how to live your best real life, know your real self well. I love the tool, the Enneagram, just have to put that plug in there. And then do your best real work. I mostly work with small business owners and entrepreneurs Love those people, people that can make their own decisions towards their destiny in their life. And sometimes they're within a company, sometimes they're outside, but mostly in coaching, but I also do some courses and some, you know, just frameworks around that process and love to speak. So you'll find that out throughout the podcast. It'll be super.

Maelisa Hall [00:03:16]:
You have your own podcast too, correct?

Theresa McCloy [00:03:18]:
I actually do. It's called the Enneagram in Your Real Life. 'Cause it's not just learning tools, right? It's learning like, can I apply this? Can I really use this information in my everyday ordinary life?

Amber [00:03:31]:
Yes, and we love the Enneagram, Melissa and I, 'cause we love all personal assessment/personality stuff. So we definitely love that. So what number are you ladies?

Theresa McCloy [00:03:43]:
I am actually a type 3. This is interesting. And Rhonda, what what is, is your?

Rhonda Peterson [00:03:49]:
I am a type 7.

Amber [00:03:51]:
I already knew that. I was gonna say you're a 7 'cause you're an ENFP. ENFP, and I think all ENFPs are 7s and have ADHD. That's just my personal theory.

Rhonda Peterson [00:04:01]:
I never got the ADHD diagnosis before, but it's probably something that's right up there.

Amber [00:04:09]:
Yeah, yeah. I was like, that really doesn't mean much. If I hadn't had 3 children in 4 and a half years, I never would have got the diagnosis either.

Maelisa Hall [00:04:20]:
Yeah, if I hadn't started a business, I probably wouldn't have.

Amber [00:04:22]:
But exactly.

Maelisa Hall [00:04:24]:
Yeah, and we like to say Probably, you know, most ENFPs have ADHD, but everyone with ADHD isn't an ENFP, right?

Rhonda Peterson [00:04:33]:
So. But the ENFPs that have ADHD are super people.

Amber [00:04:38]:
Are super, super amazing, awesome people. I love it.

Theresa McCloy [00:04:42]:
I just wanna be a JFK HI something. I don't know.

Amber [00:04:47]:
Or an LMNOP.

Theresa McCloy [00:04:49]:
You know, I can only work with a tool that has 9 types. I can't go into the— all You're.

Amber [00:04:57]:
Like, 16 is far too many. You've gone too far, people.

Theresa McCloy [00:05:00]:
Keep it simple, sweetie.

Maelisa Hall [00:05:01]:
In the Enneagram, you start going into wings, and then I think you have even more combos.

Amber [00:05:05]:
You have way more.

Theresa McCloy [00:05:06]:
You got arrows, you got harmonies, you got all kinds of things going on. I have to ask though, because we brought it up now, 'cause I think it's interesting in even, you know, biz bestie relationships, but what are you and Melissa? Amber, what are you guys?

Amber [00:05:19]:
We're 7s. We're both ENFPs.

Theresa McCloy [00:05:21]:
Both of you?

Amber [00:05:22]:
Yeah.

Maelisa Hall [00:05:23]:
Both 7s, both ENFPs, both have ADHD.

Amber [00:05:25]:
But we have different wings.

Rhonda Peterson [00:05:27]:
No, interesting.

Theresa McCloy [00:05:28]:
Probably the deciding factor, right?

Amber [00:05:30]:
Yeah, I like my things with wings.

Theresa McCloy [00:05:35]:
Yeah, just show what's your wing pads.

Amber [00:05:39]:
Personality tests, all of it. I like wings.

Theresa McCloy [00:05:41]:
Super, super.

Amber [00:05:42]:
I like chicken wings. I really do.

Theresa McCloy [00:05:49]:
Oh my word, this is so going south so quickly.

Rhonda Peterson [00:05:54]:
I can feel a dance coming on.

Amber [00:05:56]:
But I know I could.

Theresa McCloy [00:06:00]:
Well, I want to say this then. You know, Rhonda's a 7, I'm a 3. So as besties, yes, do the math, we would be a 10.

Amber [00:06:08]:
Ah, perfect 10. I like it.

Rhonda Peterson [00:06:13]:
How true is that?

Amber [00:06:15]:
This is good stuff.

Theresa McCloy [00:06:17]:
A lot of my very best friends are 7s, and I find that interesting. And I coach a lot of 7s. Entrepreneurs are they're like Sevens galore, right? Because the idea that they have, yeah. And, but then if they can get a good Three to work with them, kind of keep them a little bit on the track, it's fun for both people because there's a little bit of structure and and, you know, process moving forward. So maybe that's where Rhonda and I became such great friends is because— Yes. Yes.

Amber [00:06:45]:
So somebody has a need.

Maelisa Hall [00:06:48]:
Yes. So here, tell us the origin story.

Theresa McCloy [00:06:51]:
So I'll start the story, Rhonda, you.

Rhonda Peterson [00:06:53]:
Can— I can jump in whenever?

Theresa McCloy [00:06:55]:
Okay. Yeah. I was actually working in coaching and I was brand new. I had moved from a full-time ministry position into being a virtual assistant because a 3 can do like all kinds of jobs, right? We just think we can do everything. And at about 40 actually in my life and decided I would move into coaching. And Rhonda and I were in kind of a same group on marketing your coaching business or something. And I just reached out and said, I have to come to Columbus with my daughter to a hair show. I wasn't going to let her travel alone. Are there any coaches in Columbus? And of course Rhonda raises her hand because that's what 7s do.

Rhonda Peterson [00:07:33]:
And, um, just tell the truth.

Amber [00:07:36]:
Yeah.

Theresa McCloy [00:07:36]:
So like, I'm here. Sure. I would love to meet you. And so I think we were supposed to meet for coffee. And of course that was like a, By 1 o'clock, we were still talking. You know?

Rhonda Peterson [00:07:47]:
Actually, you're forgetting the night before.

Theresa McCloy [00:07:51]:
Oh yeah, she invites me to her house. So she decides, at that time, Rhonda has a podcast. And only podcast I've ever, very first podcast I was ever on as a guest. Rhonda says, "Come be a guest on my podcast." And I have to say this because it was funny. She records it like in her living room. We've got the editor. do. I We've got the table set up. It's me, Rhonda, and the editor in the living room and my daughter, who we've never met. We're going to some stranger's home in Columbus. And she fed us soup and it was delicious because she's a home ec teacher back in the day or something like that. And met her husband. And I think that was part of the relationship forming quickly.

Rhonda Peterson [00:08:30]:
Yeah, I think so too.

Theresa McCloy [00:08:31]:
When you've been in somebody's home, there's just something different about like, I think we've crossed over to another level of trust at this point. True. And yeah, so, and then the next day we spent like 4 or 5 hours just visiting. And then we actually did not see each other again in person till— was it Biz Chicks last year?

Rhonda Peterson [00:08:51]:
I think it was Biz Chicks. We were on Zoom calls, but we didn't see each other in person until, you know, phone calls. And Theresa's always on me about— she never knows which medium she's gonna hear from me in. I mean, I call her I might messenger her, I might send her a Voxer. You never can tell because I like to keep her on her toes.

Amber [00:09:15]:
Yeah.

Rhonda Peterson [00:09:16]:
So we did a lot She of— always responds.

Maelisa Hall [00:09:18]:
We know that issue well.

Amber [00:09:19]:
Yeah.

Rhonda Peterson [00:09:20]:
Thank God.

Amber [00:09:21]:
As a side note, I didn't realize that that perhaps was a 7 thing because I did invite a total stranger to spend the night at my house.

Rhonda Peterson [00:09:29]:
Wow. Because— I didn't do that.

Amber [00:09:32]:
Because I was home alone and I was scared. I kind of, I must have known her somewhere. And so I did lock my door, I will tell you, because I was like, well, you just never know. But it ended up being great.

Rhonda Peterson [00:09:43]:
She takes the TV, who cares?

Amber [00:09:45]:
Yeah. I was like, I just want to be alive. But just as a side note, there's more to it. But yeah, I love it. So now I know where that comes from.

Rhonda Peterson [00:09:51]:
That's interesting.

Amber [00:09:52]:
Yeah.

Theresa McCloy [00:09:53]:
So yeah.

Rhonda Peterson [00:09:53]:
Something like that.

Theresa McCloy [00:09:54]:
I think that's the cool thing though about like the busy besties.

Rhonda Peterson [00:09:58]:
Well, that too.

Theresa McCloy [00:09:59]:
Bestie relationship is we did have some things in common. Rhonda grew up on a farm and I'm that weird farm girl. And so she could relate to my crazy stories of being on the tractor and like actually liked listening to that stuff and understood that. And we, yeah, I don't know, there were just some mutual connections through things that felt like good. We were in some similar spaces in our business too. And you know, you mentioned the encouragement piece. I think we've always just tried to have a safety of calling out in each other, like Okay, you need to get your button gear, or that's not a direction for you to go, or.

Rhonda Peterson [00:10:38]:
Are you sure you want to do that?

Theresa McCloy [00:10:40]:
Yeah, yeah, are you sure you can handle all that? So, and again, this is not an Enneagram podcast, but that honesty piece, I think, of, you know, who your personality is helps a lot in just like, I can tell you like it is.

Amber [00:10:54]:
So, and I do think that that's the most important piece is when you have somebody that you trust enough to give you that hard feedback and to like challenge you, but in a— I call them carefrontations, right? So they're caring, but they're also like kind of like saying, hey, you know, like— I'm writing that down.

Maelisa Hall [00:11:14]:
She's literally writing it down.

Rhonda Peterson [00:11:16]:
So am I, just for the record.

Amber [00:11:18]:
And you can see this on our YouTube channel, of course. But yeah, action shots are all there. Yeah, I think when— because we're in a— we're all in a group coaching program together, and what I really noticed is not only do you support one another and clearly you're caring for each other, but you do kind of call each other forward. As we interviewed Geraldine and Janine, and they had talked about that, that calling you forward, not calling you out, but calling you forward. And I like that too. Such a great— yeah, such a great dynamic to have. But you guys really promote each other a lot in a really authentic, like, sincere way.

Rhonda Peterson [00:11:59]:
Well, one of the beauties of that is that we know each other well enough that we know the strengths that the other possesses. And so to say, oh, Theresa would really be good at that, or Theresa saying Rhonda can speak into that, is easy for us because we know what the other one can bring to the table.

Theresa McCloy [00:12:19]:
I think that's true. I think the other thing that, you know, if you're kind of like How do I find a business bestie type person is we don't like hang out together every day or we're not talking all the time, but it's having that person that's in the same space as you. And I don't know, Melissa, I don't even know, like, are you a therapist too? Yeah.

Amber [00:12:42]:
Yeah.

Theresa McCloy [00:12:43]:
So that's the other thing is like for the two of you, you speak the same language. Rhonda and I both work in coaching, but I don't feel like when I'm on a coaching call with her, like, she's going to ask me all the right proper coaching questions. And, you know, we've got to have action steps at the end. Like, we're not trying to coach each other, right? But like, you're not doing therapy on each other. But yet we're in the same space so we can relate to some things. But I can be very much myself and honest and ugly, but yet kind. You know, say I'm having a crappy day, all of those things, or I'm overwhelmed. And I think that's entrepreneurial business can be so isolating, just so freaking isolating. Melissa sometimes lives on a boat, she so gets isolated. You know, but I mean, or RVs or whatever she's living in today.

Amber [00:13:35]:
Those sharks don't give feedback either, I'm telling you.

Rhonda Peterson [00:13:38]:
Well, the feedback they give you don't want.

Amber [00:13:41]:
Yeah.

Maelisa Hall [00:13:41]:
Yeah, it's a little harsh.

Amber [00:13:43]:
Yeah.

Theresa McCloy [00:13:45]:
To reach out to somebody and go, you know, I'm stuck. Like, this is a bad day. Like, I, you know, so I think just knowing that you have that person and you may need one, more than one of those people, because, you know, if Rhonda's 911 number is not available or she's on a different app than what I try to reach her on.

Rhonda Peterson [00:14:07]:
And that might happen occasionally.

Maelisa Hall [00:14:11]:
That might be the problem. And that, I would say that is a theme that we have seen. It's not all of the biz bestie relationships of like the different biz bestie pairs that we have interviewed, but definitely the majority of them are in the same industry and they may be doing different things or have different types of businesses, but there does seem to be that connection around kind of knowing your industry and being able to get support in that way. So I do think that's really helpful, but also the pace thing. Like you mentioned. So you both have been able to kind of support one another, it sounds like, in a growth phase.

Theresa McCloy [00:14:42]:
I would say yes. And it's interesting you were— use the word pace, because I also think for me, my personality is very forward-moving. So, um, like the shark. Isn't there a song with the shark? Shark, shark.

Amber [00:15:01]:
Sorry, sharks never stop moving forward.

Theresa McCloy [00:15:03]:
You would think I'm a 7. I kind of spiral.

Amber [00:15:08]:
Yeah, we are giving you a lot of 7 energy though.

Rhonda Peterson [00:15:10]:
I know, um, she's just responding to it.

Theresa McCloy [00:15:14]:
But that energy is important. Like, I need to be with forward-moving energy, okay? And so, not that I dismiss everyone else, but it's like I need people to keep up. Like, keep up, people! Come on! And it sounds really rude. I love all of you more slower, peaceful people as well.

Amber [00:15:36]:
Rude. It's not.

Maelisa Hall [00:15:37]:
No, it totally makes sense.

Theresa McCloy [00:15:38]:
Yeah. In a business bestie type relationship, like, I need to be able to— I called Rhonda, like, yesterday out of the blue and said, okay, you know, we need to— I don't even know what I called you about now that I said that. Maybe the room at— I don't remember what it was.

Rhonda Peterson [00:15:53]:
It was that and scheduling this because it was to get on.

Theresa McCloy [00:15:55]:
Oh, I said we.

Rhonda Peterson [00:15:55]:
Time.

Theresa McCloy [00:15:55]:
Got to schedule this podcast.

Amber [00:15:57]:
Let's go.

Theresa McCloy [00:15:58]:
You know, and so I need to be able to just be able to call somebody, schedule them, you know, get on a call with them for 5 minutes or whatever. And some people just don't move in that space. So I think that's part of our relationship too, is just that quickness of energy.

Amber [00:16:14]:
Yeah, and even responsiveness.

Maelisa Hall [00:16:16]:
Related to what you were just talking about, Theresa, when you were talking about like how you connect and Rhonda, you might be using various apps to do that, but what, like what does your communication look like? Are you talking like on a fairly weekly basis? Is it kind of like quick 5-minute chats? Are you planning them and like digging in and having hour-long conversations? You know, give us a snapshot.

Rhonda Peterson [00:16:38]:
That would require us to be much more consistent than we are. It's more of a, you know, an email, a text. I would say we have one of those at least over a week's time, but we don't have like every Friday morning we're on a call together. We don't do that. It's a, you need a response? Or you need to share something, you send the email, you make the call depending on, you know, is this something I just want to share or is this something where I really need feedback and I need it right now? Does that sound about right, Theresa?

Theresa McCloy [00:17:11]:
Yeah, I would say so too. And we also have been— it hasn't been necessarily a planned thing, but we've been in some type of mastermind group or teaching group. Right now we're in with Carol Cox, the same one that I'm with, Speaking Your Brand. And so it seems like we've been in some type of a community group together almost since we've known each other too. So there's always that piece where we're seeing— and Rhonda has actually been a part of some of my community stuff since I started it. And so we're seeing each other show up. Yeah, she's a bad penny. We're seeing each other show up in places. So even before calls or after calls, we might have a conversation about like, so what are you going to do with that? What action are you taking? This and that and the other, or even before we join things, I think we have a lot of like need for accountability because we both have that, oh, I should sign up for this, or this would be the next best thing in the world. And so I think we both have that accountability to, to say, what are you thinking about this? Did you see that that came out? You know, so there's a lot of accountability is we're both decision makers. We're going to run our businesses and do our businesses the way we want, but we do need people to tell us no, or you don't need that right now. Or I don't always like it, but at least it makes me pause and think, and it's way better than being mad at my husband, you know.

Rhonda Peterson [00:18:34]:
So yeah, because I live like 8 hours away as opposed to in the same house.

Theresa McCloy [00:18:40]:
So if Rhonda tells me it's not a good idea, that's different than him saying, I don't know that you should do that.

Rhonda Peterson [00:18:46]:
Well, and I have told her that about something. Yes, I did it anyway, just for the record.

Amber [00:18:53]:
Well, that's that business owner part of you. But yes, I do I think— think it is helpful. I know that Melissa and I do that as well, like, to give that feedback. And yeah, ultimately it's like we're not attached to you taking the advice, but sometimes even just having somebody else give you that pause on something or ask some kind of like Yoda-like ninja question.

Rhonda Peterson [00:19:16]:
Which could be as simple— That's exactly what we do.

Amber [00:19:18]:
Yes, it could be as simple as, "Do you really need that?" And that's enough. But sometimes it is really, it is very like ninja Yoda-like wise, and you're like, "Ah, yes.".

Theresa McCloy [00:19:30]:
I agree. And we do do the email thing too, Melissa. Like, you know, we'll send an email and say, "What are you thinking of this?" or "This is going on for me right now." I don't need to have a long conversation about it, but I just wanted to let you know that this is what's come up for me. Or yesterday when Rhonda was sharing with me on one of my community calls, like, we're going to remodel the whole house. And we were talking about it a little bit beforehand off the record here. I did not know that she was putting in an elevator until— I said to her, and I meant it in all seriousness, like, If you're going to remodel your house so we can age in place, just sit with that, people. If you're going to do that, I said to her, I go, we need to have some serious conversations about what else you're going to try to accomplish in that time. It's because I do love her and I want to say you cannot remodel your house and also like do 14 other projects at the same time.

Rhonda Peterson [00:20:30]:
This is true. And just for the record, I need somebody to say things like that to me because I, of course, am of doing capable 16 times what everyone else is capable of. That is a total flat-out lie, but my brain says that on occasion.

Amber [00:20:45]:
No, and that's the thing, our brains do lie to us. I feel Melissa and I could join you in that boat. Um, so apparently we're just— now I'm on the hunt for a 3. Really, that's what I I am. am gonna go find me a 3.

Rhonda Peterson [00:20:57]:
I've always had me a 3 VA.

Theresa McCloy [00:20:59]:
Yeah, yeah, for sure.

Rhonda Peterson [00:21:02]:
Yes, this is true. To whip me into shape. God knows I need it.

Theresa McCloy [00:21:05]:
I just want to know If you need to talk to me as a coach about the fact that she's ditching you for a 3.

Maelisa Hall [00:21:14]:
You'Re offering up your supportive ear.

Theresa McCloy [00:21:16]:
Yeah, you can process.

Amber [00:21:19]:
I'm leaving you for her, so I'm just moving here. See, yeah.

Rhonda Peterson [00:21:25]:
I don't know.

Theresa McCloy [00:21:25]:
That is a 3. I think that I could manage both of you.

Amber [00:21:31]:
We are not always monogamous. Even though I personally would like a little more monogamy in our life. I like being a serial monogamist.

Theresa McCloy [00:21:44]:
Melissa's trying so hard to ask a question.

Rhonda Peterson [00:21:47]:
Well, related to that, have either of.

Maelisa Hall [00:21:51]:
You had another biz bestie in the past or have one now?

Theresa McCloy [00:21:54]:
Yeah, gosh, do I have to admit that? I feel like I'm having an affair.

Amber [00:21:57]:
I know, I was like, Rhonda just got real serious and she looks very sad right now. Yeah, of course I do.

Theresa McCloy [00:22:07]:
I actually do have a couple of other people that I meet with, and it's a totally different relationship than I have with Rhonda. Doesn't that sound so different? It sounds like we're dating. This is going so many bad places.

Amber [00:22:21]:
You're like, it's just work, I swear.

Rhonda Peterson [00:22:24]:
There really aren't— we don't— we're not.

Amber [00:22:27]:
Really sharing feelings the way we do, and I love you.

Theresa McCloy [00:22:31]:
It is totally different because we do meet every Friday in kind of a mastermind. And so it's different. And we actually, they all came to Biz Chicks. We all roomed together. I brought all my friends to the party.

Rhonda Peterson [00:22:45]:
All 4 of us roomed together. Now, how would you like to interpret that?

Amber [00:22:49]:
Right. So Biz Bestie Orgy style.

Theresa McCloy [00:22:55]:
Oh, you went so wrong with all that. Oh my. So, but yes, I do think I have other business relationships and I think it's important that, I mean, Rhonda and I's is different. We are biz besties. We've joked about that. But yeah, I think, you know, Rhonda.

Amber [00:23:14]:
Has— Of course you can say that.

Theresa McCloy [00:23:15]:
In fact, when she sends, I will call her out, when she sends the email sometimes to me, there'll be 3 or 4 other people copied in on it as well.

Rhonda Peterson [00:23:23]:
This is true. This is true.

Amber [00:23:25]:
Well, I will say as a therapist, I have been known to talk to people where I say one other person is not a support system, that's a partnership. So it's good to have more than one.

Theresa McCloy [00:23:36]:
I like it because it's supposed to be a system.

Amber [00:23:39]:
At the same time, Rhonda, I feel like you're going to be getting flowers tomorrow. That's all I'm saying.

Theresa McCloy [00:23:46]:
Okay, tweet out the one thing in that whole last 30 seconds that was tweetable, and it wasn't about me sending flowers, it was about The support system. Yes.

Amber [00:23:56]:
No, the support.

Rhonda Peterson [00:23:57]:
Well, it depends. I think that a tweet that says send Rhonda flowers is a beautiful tweet. I'm just saying.

Amber [00:24:05]:
Here is her address. You endorse that one, internet people?

Theresa McCloy [00:24:08]:
So now your house looks like a funeral home.

Rhonda Peterson [00:24:14]:
It is not the kind of help I need. Thank you.

Theresa McCloy [00:24:17]:
Too much fun.

Amber [00:24:18]:
I know, but it's true. So I think it is. I mean, we're joking, but obviously I do think that that is an important thing. And for the reasons you said as well, there are times where you might be having, you know, a personal crisis or just really needing something and your biz bestie is busy. Like people have lives. And so they might be, you know, away on vacation, which is the worst. Always try to coordinate your vacations. I know, so rude. But no, like life is busy. So then you need other people in that. You don't want to be burning people out, but you also want to feel like, It can't just be like, I'm only supported when I have this person and otherwise I feel like lost and lonely.

Rhonda Peterson [00:24:55]:
Yeah, that's kind of frightening actually.

Theresa McCloy [00:24:57]:
I think a friend of mine, one of my mentors calls it his 3 AM list. Like, who's on your 3 AM list? And you know, when you talk— and I just love that because you sit and think and all of us on this call and anybody listening, we've all had those crises, right? Whether it's a business or personal or whatever. And it's like, who would you call at 3 AM? Rhonda is somebody that I know I could call at 3:00 AM, and because of that trust factor that we have, not just business but also personal values that we have in our lives, all those types of things, not everyone that I know in a business relationship would probably be on the 3:00 AM list, if that makes— not to be all sappy and weird, but Rhonda would be on that list because she would pick up the phone for me at 3:00 AM. Other people might go, "Nope." You know, not doing it.

Rhonda Peterson [00:25:49]:
What is Theresa— that must be a butt dial at 3 AM, for God's sake.

Theresa McCloy [00:25:54]:
Over on her phone, you know.

Rhonda Peterson [00:25:58]:
Why does she have her phone in the bed?

Theresa McCloy [00:26:01]:
But Rhonda would answer the phone.

Rhonda Peterson [00:26:03]:
Yes, I would.

Theresa McCloy [00:26:03]:
And I think there's a trust value though that comes from any friendship that's different that I don't have to talk to you every day. I don't have to know every detail of your life. I mean, I know a lot about Rhonda over the last really just 2.5, 3 years that we've known each other. I know grandkids, I know husband stories, I know the tragedies, the trials, the business up and downs and the personal, but I don't have to talk to her every day or even— the other day we said, we've got to have a catch-up phone call because, you know, we know that it's getting too far away where She's been busy, I've been busy, we both have grown some things in our businesses and we need to find out about those, but I think it's, for me, I really value 3:00 AM people, so.

Amber [00:26:50]:
I love that, I think that's nice.

Rhonda Peterson [00:26:52]:
3:00 AM people.

Theresa McCloy [00:26:53]:
It's the 3 thing, right? 3:00 AM, 3, you know, so.

Rhonda Peterson [00:26:58]:
It's the 3:00 AM thing, but the other thing is, when she was talking about the people that are on the email that I was, she says, "And there are other people on the email too.".

Theresa McCloy [00:27:10]:
You're cheating on me too, friend.

Rhonda Peterson [00:27:14]:
Well, at least I'm right up front.

Theresa McCloy [00:27:15]:
About it, you know.

Maelisa Hall [00:27:16]:
Hey, it is what it is.

Rhonda Peterson [00:27:17]:
The other people who were on that email aren't people that understand the business side of it like she does, and that's one of the things I really value about the relationship with Teresa is not only does she have other values that we are in alignment on But she gets the building a business part of it. And that is so important because there are other people on that list that the whole business side of it is not in their wheelhouse. And so I can say whatever I want to them and they're not going to get it like Theresa does. So that's important to me. It is anyway.

Amber [00:27:59]:
Yeah, I love that. So my mind is actually was going to a place of like, huh, 3:00 AM people are the people who are good in a crisis and are the true support. People, that's like the booty call people, right? Like, those are very different people. They're the people you want to have fun with. And my brain was like going down that route, even though you guys were giving me such good information.

Rhonda Peterson [00:28:22]:
Why would you like be on what we're talking about?

Theresa McCloy [00:28:25]:
No, no, actually, you can multitask.

Amber [00:28:29]:
I know, I track pretty well being a therapist.

Maelisa Hall [00:28:32]:
But yeah, I think I need like, I think I need an 8 AM person.

Theresa McCloy [00:28:35]:
That's what I was gonna say.

Maelisa Hall [00:28:37]:
Who's like, hey, It's 8 AM, what are you doing? What are you doing today? Like, you know?

Amber [00:28:42]:
I could totally do that.

Rhonda Peterson [00:28:43]:
Tracy can be that person, just for the record.

Theresa McCloy [00:28:46]:
Yeah. When I'm in my bad place, I can definitely be that, like, okay, we need to kick it in gear people. I try to be more chill than I used to be in my younger.

Rhonda Peterson [00:28:57]:
Years, but— Actually, she can be very kindly, get on the stick! Very kindly. But she's been known to do that to me when we were actually in the same space together. And I deserved it and I needed it. I'm sorry. Yeah, she was definitely carefrontationing me.

Amber [00:29:14]:
Like the queen of carefrontations. I love that. I love it.

Theresa McCloy [00:29:17]:
Look, I wrote it down. It's like a squiggle line.

Amber [00:29:21]:
I was like, I'm not sure that's legible. That looks like a heart monitor thing.

Theresa McCloy [00:29:25]:
I can't spell, so I just like—.

Maelisa Hall [00:29:29]:
As long as you know what it means.

Amber [00:29:30]:
Yeah, exactly. That's that all matters.

Rhonda Peterson [00:29:33]:
Starts with a C, ends with an N. We're all good.

Amber [00:29:35]:
I love it. Well, so If you guys were going to give advice to people besides inviting them into our home and making them.

Theresa McCloy [00:29:43]:
Soup and how how to— to go.

Amber [00:29:45]:
On and meet their biz bestie. Yes.

Theresa McCloy [00:29:49]:
Or to stay the night with you when you don't even know them.

Amber [00:29:52]:
Yeah, well, she didn't— I like her a lot, so I'm still connected to her, but she's not my biz bestie.

Theresa McCloy [00:29:57]:
So.

Amber [00:30:00]:
That really does sound creepy. I think that's the creepiest story of all.

Theresa McCloy [00:30:03]:
So there you go.

Amber [00:30:05]:
But yeah, what would you suggest to people out there who are like, okay, I need How do you define that person?

Rhonda Peterson [00:30:11]:
It's a good question.

Theresa McCloy [00:30:14]:
Do you want to go or do you want me to?

Rhonda Peterson [00:30:16]:
I'll let you start and then I'll.

Amber [00:30:17]:
Jump in when— When you're breathing.

Rhonda Peterson [00:30:24]:
I can interrupt at the best of them.

Theresa McCloy [00:30:26]:
You know, I think if you're looking for it, you probably won't find it. And you know, that's not great advice.

Rhonda Peterson [00:30:31]:
That's a good point.

Theresa McCloy [00:30:33]:
I was not looking to. In fact, you know, when we first met and we had this weekend together, it sounds like such a funny thing. Where we had connected in person. So I will say that for me, in person is huge. Eventually, I want to be with you face to face. I want to, you know, share a meal with you because I'm all about food. And because I've met both of you face to you face, know, at a conference last year, and there's something about like, I can hang out with you on Zoom and do all that and feel a connection, but there's something about face to face. So I think for Rhonda and I, because we had face to face up up front, then it grew very quickly and very deeply. I would say if you're trying to find that, who can be a biz bestie for me, and you're attending conferences and you're going to things and events, have your heart open to that. I don't know any other way to say it than that.

Rhonda Peterson [00:31:27]:
It's a good way to phrase it.

Theresa McCloy [00:31:28]:
Go open. Go with open hands, open heart, open mind to like, maybe this person and I can go have dinner together and see where it leads to, just the two of us. And, you know, we're 2 or 3 people together and go, I want to follow up with you. Like, I want to see if there's more. But then I think the other thing I would say about that is be okay if there's not. Like, if it doesn't go to that, I'm a big proponent of having people in your life that matter, but some people aren't supposed to be in your life and it's okay to have good boundaries and go, okay, that was a great conversation. We had a great connection at that conference. Conference or that event or whatever we were at, but you're not my biz bestie. Sorry. You know, the trial run is over. We're breaking up now.

Amber [00:32:15]:
The one-night stand has ended and we are moving on. Yes.

Theresa McCloy [00:32:19]:
How much energy though do we drain in our lives? And this is a big thing for Energy me. again. Trying to keep up with relationships that aren't the right relationships. And it's, you know, release it and let it go. Because depending on your personality, you can feel like you have to manage all that, and it's exhausting. So look for them, be open to them, but be willing to go, well, that was for a season. That's another thing I'm about to— people come in and out of our lives for a season. So you may have a biz bestie for a while. Really, Rhonda, the whole reason we're having this call is I'm drinking. No, I'm kidding.

Amber [00:32:56]:
Well, I needed witnesses. Book appointments with me for that.

Theresa McCloy [00:32:59]:
So yeah, Yes, this is true, and I needed Amber and Melissa to be on for therapy.

Rhonda Peterson [00:33:04]:
Geez, Theresa!

Theresa McCloy [00:33:05]:
No, I'm kidding, but— I know, it's just like, whoa!

Amber [00:33:09]:
Those flowers are gonna be huge.

Theresa McCloy [00:33:10]:
So I've rambled enough, Rhonda, you can take over from here on what people need.

Rhonda Peterson [00:33:16]:
I like what Theresa said about being open to it and being in person with people. Even though some of the people that are on my email list, are people that I've been connected with through electronic means. We've never actually been in the same space. Well, actually, one person we actually have been in the same space. I just didn't know her when we were in the same space, if that is not the craziest thing. But I think that being in the same space is a huge plus because that gives you the opportunity to— because, you know, you can read only so much of communication in a Zoom call that you see more when you're in person with that person. That's just all there is to it, all the nonverbals. And to be open to that person being in a space you might not expect them to be in. I mean, you don't know where this person's going to come from. So to just be open to the possibility, but also to not be so driven by, I gotta find a biz bestie that you drive that person away.

Amber [00:34:23]:
So don't be needy.

Rhonda Peterson [00:34:24]:
That would be one way to phrase it since we have the therapists on the call. But you have to be able to stand yourself so that there's something for them to be attracted to.

Amber [00:34:34]:
Yes, I agree. I do love the irony of that though, that I'm saying it in the least kind way possible.

Theresa McCloy [00:34:41]:
I think the other thing too is if you're going to say yes to a new relationship, do you have the energy to give to it.

Amber [00:34:48]:
Right.

Theresa McCloy [00:34:49]:
Right? Because, you know, a lot of people are vying for— we're just such fun people to hang out with, all of us.

Amber [00:34:55]:
I mean.

Theresa McCloy [00:34:55]:
So passionately. that But I'm just saying, people could want to be your business bestie. And you're like, I remember making the decision like in my 40s, like, I'm going to be friends with 5 people really well. And that's it. And that sounds like— I know a.

Amber [00:35:12]:
Lot of people— I was like, the fact that you had a number, I was like, that is so 3.

Theresa McCloy [00:35:17]:
No, it was like all I could manage. Like, I want to be the person who shows up at 3:00 AM, but I can't do that for everybody. And that number has changed throughout my life. So if I'm going to say yes to Rhonda as a Biz Bestie, then I want to be a good Biz Bestie. Like, you know, I really do want to do it well. And so I think that's why we have to be able to say yes to people and then also say no, I need to let that go and release it for whatever reason. 'cause I can only manage so much. Man, we kill ourselves with the expectation of friendships and relationships.

Amber [00:35:52]:
So being discerning is what helps have better quality in relationship.

Theresa McCloy [00:35:58]:
My 5 was quality, not quantity.

Amber [00:36:00]:
Yeah, yeah, I like that.

Maelisa Hall [00:36:03]:
Yeah, and it makes so much sense too. Yeah, if you're not being honest with yourself about what you do need to release, then you're not making room for these other things to happen, right?

Rhonda Peterson [00:36:12]:
So very true, yeah.

Theresa McCloy [00:36:14]:
Another truth bomb right there, people.

Amber [00:36:16]:
I know.

Theresa McCloy [00:36:17]:
Yeah, this is a super truth bomb.

Amber [00:36:19]:
I was gonna say it's a supersized truth bomb episode. Super sized. Is it surprising?

Theresa McCloy [00:36:28]:
We're never being asked back. I just want you to know that.

Amber [00:36:31]:
Are you kidding me? I only want you guys coming back. I don't know if our listeners will agree, but they might be like, um Girl, they're not listening anymore.

Theresa McCloy [00:36:43]:
They turned off.

Amber [00:36:44]:
They're already done. They're like, we're here in at the end of that one.

Rhonda Peterson [00:36:47]:
Was there— they really need to come back in. Yep, they're way out there.

Amber [00:36:53]:
Yeah, maybe we'll put a little teaser in the beginning that says you get like winning lottery ticket numbers if you listen all the way through or something. I don't know, you may have to.

Rhonda Peterson [00:37:02]:
Yes, 57, 23.

Maelisa Hall [00:37:06]:
Although I don't know if you're counting the number of like tweetable and truth bombs, then this episode is just full of it.

Amber [00:37:12]:
So it is jam-packed.

Theresa McCloy [00:37:13]:
This is true. This is true.

Rhonda Peterson [00:37:16]:
Yeah.

Amber [00:37:16]:
Well, if people wanted to find out more information about you two lovely ladies and try to persuade you to possibly be one of your Five, where would they find you?

Theresa McCloy [00:37:26]:
I know. I have said so many bad things on this episode.

Amber [00:37:30]:
She's like, no, I love it. She's like, actually, I'm closed for business on the Five, but if you want.

Theresa McCloy [00:37:35]:
To work with me— In 2022, I'll like be open, you know?

Rhonda Peterson [00:37:42]:
And Teresa won't let me do anything with anybody until after June of next year. So that's not true.

Theresa McCloy [00:37:50]:
So why don't you all just share how we connect with you? Because we're off the— no, I'm kidding.

Amber [00:37:56]:
But there's always energy for paying people.

Rhonda Peterson [00:37:58]:
So that's very true. Amen, sister.

Theresa McCloy [00:38:01]:
It's true. I can be found at thereallifeprocess.com, which is really easy. I spell real life with one L though, so therealifeprocess.com or just type in my name, Theresa McCloy, you'll get that as well. Have some places that I hang out on Facebook and yeah, that's kind of me. Awesome.

Amber [00:38:24]:
How about you, Rhonda?

Rhonda Peterson [00:38:25]:
And you can find me at a really interesting web address, rhondapeterson.com. R-H-O-N-D-A.

Theresa McCloy [00:38:33]:
So plain for a 7.

Rhonda Peterson [00:38:35]:
I mean, I'm just like— Hey, you know what? I did all those crazy things for a while and I decided that My name is an awesome place to be found on the web. RhondaPeterson.com.

Theresa McCloy [00:38:47]:
Yes.

Amber [00:38:47]:
Yes. S-O-N though.

Rhonda Peterson [00:38:49]:
Yes.

Maelisa Hall [00:38:50]:
P-E-T-E-R-S-O-N.

Rhonda Peterson [00:38:52]:
And I am Rhonda Peterson Coach on LinkedIn. So connect with me there.

Amber [00:38:57]:
Awesome.

Maelisa Hall [00:38:58]:
Awesome. See, clear is better than clever a lot of the time.

Theresa McCloy [00:39:01]:
Absolutely.

Maelisa Hall [00:39:02]:
Easy to remember.

Theresa McCloy [00:39:04]:
Another truth bomb. Super.

Maelisa Hall [00:39:05]:
I know. Just all over the place for you guys.

Theresa McCloy [00:39:08]:
Drop some.

Maelisa Hall [00:39:10]:
So let us know what you think. We would love it if you would leave us a review on Apple Podcasts because we want to have more episodes like this if that's what you love. And we also want to know what it is that you are learning. So let us know what you thought about today and we will see you next week.